7 Things Guys Do Online After A Breakup – Part 1

7 Things Guys Do Online After A Breakup - Part 1

The wonderful or tumultuous relationship that you are in has come to a close. You’ve decided to see other people. You’ve broken up. She’s no longer yours and you are no longer hers. It’s over Johnny, it’s over.

Some guys go out and get drunk after a breakup. More now than ever, there is a growing segment of guys that handle this difficult time by spending most of it online. There’s a lot of stuff guys do via the internet after a breakup. Not all of it is healthy behavior. Here’s some of the shit we tend to do.

Portray A False Sense Of Happiness


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Because the relationship is over right? Whew, glad we’re past that right? Come on, be serious with yourself for a second. Everyone knows you’re full of shit. Woman breaks up with you on a Tuesday, if by Thursday you’re posting about what a great day you had and how happy you are everyone is going to know you’re putting on a show for their benefit so they don’t have to sit and discuss whether or not they should drive you to grief counseling.

Sure, we say shit on Facebook and whatnot about how she was crazy and how deep down we are happy to be rid of her. But it’s all a lie. We just don’t want to look like wimps in front of our friends. Hell, everything around you is going to be a constant reminder of her. We try to put on a brave front by being the first one to organize evenings out with the guys, extra trips to the gym and posting pictures on out walls of us smiling like we ingested too many joker products.

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We Brag About Going Out


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Let’s be real here, going to the same dive hole in the wall bar with your mates for the fiftieth time is not something to be bragging out. However, after a girl breaks up with us, we act like we’re climbing Everest and post pictures of ourselves with our friends in our best “rocking out” poses. All of which have the sincerity of a get well soon card from the town mortician.

The fact is, the sting from what chick stabbing us in the heart with a rusty knife and then turning the blade ever so slowly is still strong. Hell, it may even keep you from getting out of bed. So even if we aren’t going to the bar with the guys, we’ll do shit like change our Facebook status to “Having a kick ass time with the boyz”, and yes it will always be spelled with a z; just do our ex doesn’t know that we’re sitting with a box of tissues crying our eyes out and watching rom coms on Netflix.

We Listen To Sad Music


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Even though we have to put on a face like we’re tough lumberjacks or something, we men actually like sad music just about as much as the women in our lives do. We listen to sad music on a regular basis even when there isn’t shit to really be sad about. Toss a breakup in there and the likelihood of us busting out the sad playlist on our IPod get multiplied by about a factor of twenty.

We get the sad playlist up and running, stare out a window and think about the time we did whatever with the chick that just dumped us. Hell, some of you probably got the last half of the Nirvana Unplugged album going right now. It’s necessary to the process of getting over a woman, and most guys do it. However, there are some of us that feel the need to sync our Facebook with our mp3 players sending out minute by minute updates of what song we are listening to. That way everyone knows we are sad. Not saying it’s unmanly to be rightfully upset, but not everyone needs to know this through the power of song


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