How To Approach Women Based On The Situation

1. If You See A Wet Sign

You: Hey watch out, you see that wet floor sign? I wouldn’t want you to slip and fall for me.

2. Group Openers

From Juggler

1. Hey didn’t you notice when you have a group of 4 people or more, the tallest (point at the tallest) always stands opposite the shortest (tap the shortest on the head).

2. Who are you people and why are you taking over this place?

3. Hey there, who’s the leader? (Wait for them to point), So what do I need to do to apply as well?

4. Hey guys, I learned this new magic trick! Close your eyes and count to

5. (Then take the cute girl by the arm and walk away).

6. Hey, that group over there told me that they are heaps more fun than this group. Please prove them wrong or I’ll lose $5. 6. Hey, for some reason you look familiar, where you at my stripper party where the clown gave the stripper a lap dance?

7. Hey this group would be so much better if you applied some Feng Shui to the positioning.

 3. Groups of Guys & Girls (Mixed Sets)

In the world of seduction, if you see a bunch of guys and girls out together, then it’s called a mixed set. As a general rule of thumb you want to chat to the guys first. The reason for this is because most of the obstacles you meet when trying to pick up girls with guys will be the guys themselves. So you want to be friendly with the guys to disarm them.

3. 1. High Five Opener

Just give a high five to a guy, then give one to everyone in the group and turn your attention back to the guy. Talk to men should be easy, just talk about cars, music, sports, women you know manly things.

3. 2. Cool Club Opener

You: Hey, I just moved here, you seem cool. Do you know where are the coolest places to hang out in town?

3. 3. Name Exchange

You: Hey dude, nice to meet you, I’m XYZ

Him: [His name]

You: Where are you from? I just moved here and I am rebuilding my social circle. You guys seem fun enough to hang out with. Him: Blah blah Small talk for a few minutes.

You: Hey your group of girls look cool and friendly, who are they? And how do you know each other?

3.4 How Do You Know Each Other?

Sometimes a guy will SAY that he is dating a girl, but in reality he just wishes he was. But he’ll say that to throw you off. So you want to check if what he is saying is true. You: Hey how do you know each other?

Him: She’s my girlfriend.

You: (asking the girl) How long you been together?

  • Response 1 – Her: No, he’s not my boyfriend
  • Response 1 – You: Oh, he’s your ex? (Find out the situation so you know if you can hit on her or not).
  • Response 2 – Her: Yeah, we’re engaged now.
  • Response 2 – You: Oh that’s awesome! My girlfriend wants me to settle down too. But what made you take the plunge (once you find out she’s not available mention that you have a girlfriend so you’re not perceived as a threat, then quickly leave the situation after).

4. Hypothetical Questions For All Situations

From Victor Malvado

The idea behind this routine is you ask a woman a hypothetical question about the exact situation where you’re meeting her. You: Hey there, I got a quick hypothetical question for you.

Her: Ok?

You: So I want you to imagine this. Pretend you’re walking down the street by yourself and you see some random dude walk up to you. And he looks like [describe yourself] and he’s tall dark and handsome. He starts talking to you about a topic that is totally obscure and ridiuclous, but for some reason you keep listening anyway. What would you think? Do you think he’s creepy or be like “oh hey this guy’s interesting” and go out with him for a coffee.

5. Magazine Or Newspaper Opener

Use this line if you see a girl reading a newspaper or gossip magazine. You: Hey there, quick question. I got to run real soon but, what are you reading? I haven’t watched the news in the past few days been a bit busy. What’s happening in the world? Give me a quick 5 minute update!

6. If You See A Girl Looking At A Book Or Magazine

You: Hey, I wouldn’t read that book. Just look at it, it’s totally boring looking, don’t you think so? Her: No. You: Really, what are some interesting books you have read.

7. If You See A Girl Touching Things At The Store/Bookstore

You: What are you doing? Can you stop picking up things and touching it? I bet you drove your mom crazy. Her: Huh? You: I was just joking, you seemed to be looking for something, what are you looking for?

8. If A Girl Is Serving You

You: Hey, what’s your favourite thing to eat? It better be good, because if it’s bad I’m totally blaming it on you!

Or

You: Hey, what do you recommend I should order?

Her: Blah blah.

You: Ok, I’m going to avoid that. It’s probably the most expensive thing on the menu since you work here!

Or

Her: Hi there, welcome to XYZ restaurant, can I get you something?

You: Yes, can I get some socks and shoes?

Her: Huh?

You: I was just messing with you, what’s something that you’d recommend? It better be good or I’m going to be mad at you.

Or

Her: Hi there, what can I get for you?

You: Just a random question, what’s the worst pickup line you’ve heard when at work? I am curious to know. It’ll help me order!

9. If A Girl Is Looking At Her Phone

You: So did he call you?

Her: Huh?

You: Oh he didn’t? That’s a shame, you look like a fun and cute girl. How come he didn’t call you? Isn’t that why you’re staring at your phone?

10. If You See A Bored Girl

From A-Train

You: Hey, you are looking totally bored there. Don’t you just hate it when you’re looking at the people around you and they are having a good time and you don’t know but you’re not feeling it for some reason. Then don’t you just hate it when someone cute walks up to you and smiles at you (smile) and forces you to have a good time? Like I was at work the other day bored out of my mind, then the cutest receptionist I have ever seen came up to me and said “hey why the pouty face” (make a pouty face) and I just had to smile back (smile). Anyways, I just had to come and see you smile. I’m going to go back to my friends now…  But before I do, what’s your name?

If you did it right, chances are the girl will be smiling at the end of the opener.

11. If You See A Girl Buying A Drink

Her: (orders a drink)

You: (get her attention)…and a double vodka and coke and a pint of fosters for my mate.

Her: (laughs) I thought guys are the ones who usually buy drinks for us.

You: Yeah…usually…but you look the type who likes to try something different.

12. If A Girl Is On Her Mobile Phone And Gets Off It

You: (scan your own phone and say) Did you just text me? Sneaky girl! Very good!

13. If You See A Seated Woman

Stand in front of the girl. Extend your hand with palm facing up towards her and say:

You: Press my elevator button.

Her: (Surprised, presses your palm)

You: Going down  buzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

Slowly bend your knees down to lower yourself until you’re level with her eyes and say:

You: My 6 year old niece loves that… so how old are you?

14. Lukewarm Drinks

This one is great for mixed sets. What you want to do is make the men in the group on your side before winning over the women.

You: Guys, is your drink cold? I bought one half an hour ago and it was so hot and I just threw it away. Don’t you just hate it when the bar tender hands you a lukewarm drink? So how do we all know each other?

As you’re asking the question, take a look at everyone in the group including the guys and girls. This will be an indicator for everyone to introduce how they know each other, then you can introduce yourself afterwards.

14. Smoking Section Opener

Walk towards your target and tap her on the shoulder and say:

You: Shit! I think you’re cigarette is on fire! Let me put it out for you!

This is when you pull out your cigarette and put it between your lips and “put out her fire” with your own cigarette.

You: Gee, you’re a trouble maker, everything you touch turns into fire! Why are you out here alone by yourself anyway?

15. I Saw You Looking At Me Opener

You walk in and see a girl who looks at you then turns away. Approach her and say:

You: Hey! I saw you looking at me…(pause for a while but do not let her answer)…if not I bet this is awkward….either way… Hi my name is XYZ.

16. If There’s A Pool Table

You: Do you and your girlfriends want to play doubles with us, battle of the sexes?

It is suggested that you let them win and then ask for a rematch. As the game progresses dive into your chance of getting to know them more. Make it so that you are paired with a girl, and your buddy is paired with her friend.

17. If You See A Girl Sitting On A Chair At A Table Alone

You: So how many chairs do you need?

18. If You See Her Holding A Door Open For You

You: You make a very good door stop. I need a few of you at home. How much do one of you’s cost?

19. If She’s Wearing A Shirt About Sports

You: I really like (the team).

Her: Really! Thanks.

You: Without them, (the rival team) would have no one to beat.

20. If She’s Wearing Makeup 

You: Hey, I gotta go, but I just noticed something about you. I don’t know about you. You seem to love make up too much. Why are you trying to hide your pretty face?

Or

You: Hey, I have to go soon, but real quick, what’s up with all the makeup? The natural beauty of your eyes would really show if you lightened up with the eye shadow.

21. Clothing Centric Openers

21.1 If She’s Wearing A Loose White Top:

You: That’s a cool top. I have a ghost costume just like it back home. You’ve probably seen me on ‘Ghost Hunters’

21.2 If She’s Wearing A Black Top:

You: That’s a cool top. You look like Batman – stay right there. I have my Alfred costume at home!

21.3 If She’s Wearing A Yellow Top:

You: That’s a cool top. I have a big-bird costume just like it! Seen any of his later work? Really takes a back seat to groove.

21.4 If She’s Wearing A Multi-Colored Top:

You: That’s a cool top. I have a rug just like it at home.  I bought it in Persia. And by Persia I mean Pier 1.

21.5 If She’s Wearing A Black and White (Striped) Top:

You: That’s a cool top. Whenever I watch football I always root for the refs. Clearly you agree. Either that or you just really like chess boards.

21.6 If She’s Wearing A Blue or Green Top:

You: That’s a nice top! It matches my eyes. This is destiny. Marry me. We’ll honeymoon in Paris and be drunk off of wine and absinthe.

21.7 If She’s Wearing Any Other Color Top:

You: That’s a cool top. Too bad it doesn’t match my eyes. We could have had something special. I guess we’ll just be friends. I’m [your name].

21.8 Girlfriend Material Opener

You: [Get the woman’s attention by pointing out a piece of her clothing and looking puzzled] What material is your top made of?”

Her: What?

You:   Your top. [feel the material] What’s it made of?

Her: Hmmm. I don’t know. Cotton maybe?

You:  [Pensively] Are you sure it’s only cotton, or is it a blend?

Her: I don’t know. Maybe it’s rayon

You: [Shaking your head] Are you sure it’s cotton? Because it looks like girl-friend material to me. [give a cocky smile and transition to conversation]

21.9 Softest Shirt Ever Opening

You: Wow! Your shirt looks really comfortable [touch it]. What material is it?

Her: [Reply]

You: My shirt is the softest ever. Check it out [she reaches for a touch]. Careful though, you might not be able to take your hands off. (Smile)

21.10 Nice Shoes Opener

You: Hey nice shoes! They look comfortable. What’s your name?

21.11 What Brand of Shoes Opener

[If she is wearing Nike or Adidas or some major brand name shoe]

You:  Who makes those?

Her: Ummm Nike

You:  Never heard of them

Her: [Laughing] Hahah really?

You:  Of course I have heard of Nike. What’s your name?

21.12 Where did You get That? 

You: Excuse me, I don’t usually do this but I want to ask a quick question.

Her: Ok sure.

You: I only have a minute, but where did you get that [insert piece of clothing that looks really cool] from?

Her: [She will say where she got it from or doesn’t know]

You: Oh ok cool, well you seem to have a very good eye for fashion. I had a friend just like you when I was working at [expensive and well known clothes shop] but I need help looking for a [insert item of clothing you mentioned] for my cousin. It’s her birthday coming up soon.

21.13 In A Unisex Clothes Shop

Find your target or set, get clothing to match her size roughly and walk up to her, and hold the clothes to her body.

You: It’s for my sister; you have roughly the same figure

Or

You: [Just walk up and do it, then say] Thanks! [and walk away]

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22. If You See Her Using A Lighter

For example, giving a girl a lighter when she needs one, you hand it over, walk about two steps away and face away, she then has to leave her group (Isolate) to hand it back, then when she does you touch her hand in the process.

You: Usually it stuffs up, did it work?

[If you get a really funny or unique lighter she will comment on it too]

23. Using A drink

Order an interesting drink. If a girl asks you what it is, tell her to have a sip and walk away. She will have to follow you in order to give it back.

You: Have you tried [unique drink] ?

You: [If she says yes] What’s it like?

You: [If she says no] Here, have a sip.

24. Use The Really Drunk Guy

When you see a really drunk guy in the bar making a fool of himself you can use this to your advantage.

You: Do you know him?

or

You: Is that your friend?

25. Using Her Dog

Wait for the dog to sniff you, then squat down. Let it smell you and then start petting it.

You: What is the breed of your dog?

Or

Her: This dog is soooo spoiled.

You: [Neg hit] Yea, you have to get control of that…..

26. If You See Her In An Aquarium

Carry around a book with you about different kinds of beautiful fish.

You: Excuse me. I’d like to get a woman’s perspective of something beautiful.

Take a pause to let her ponder what beautiful thing we could be talking about. Then open the book and tell her

You: I am looking to get a pair of clownfish for my tank. Which do you find more attractive? What about the original orange kind? Maybe a pair of blacks or maybe the pinkish colored ones would be better? But you can’t say those goofy ones over there okay? [smile]

Her: [Response]

You: See I knew there was a reason why I should come ask you, I was thinking the same thing. I knew you would be smart. I’m just glad you didn’t say get them all!

You: Ha-ha just kidding [smile]. But seriously, I’m not going to get them all [Be completely serious when you say this. This should produce a laugh between you two]

Additional potential lines

You: Look at the nose on that fish. It’s kind of like yours. ha-ha.

Or

You: That fish has a spot like yours (while point to a freckle).

or

You: That fish has really beautiful eyes, kind of similar to yours.

Or

You: This fish is really colorful, it seems like it has a nice spirit. If you were fish you’d probably be him hahaha.

27. If You’ve Got A Camera Or Use Your Camera On Your Phone

You: Hey, can you take our picture? Thanks!

[Don’t even let her really reply. Just give her the camera to take a picture of you and a group of friends, showing social proof]

You: [Big smile] You do know how to work a camera, right?

Her: Of course I do! Here, everyone together…

You: Sweet! Thanks! Now one of me and you!

[Hand off the camera to a friend and pull her over for the picture]

28. Quick Hits List

You: Wow, this bar is really crowded

Or

You: I love how everyone here looks exactly the same.

Or

You: [If a girl sneezes] Do you have bird flu?

Or

You: I love how they have 2 bartenders for 500 thirsty people.

29.  If She Has Headphones

You: [Sits down right in front of her, and motion to take off her headphones]

You: Do you wear head phones because you don’t want people to talk to you? Are you anti-social? I mean what if there’s that one guy on the bus who asks if anybody has an umbrella he could eat? But you just want no part of anyone. [smile]

Her: Nooo…… I’m not anti-social, I just…”

You: Well now I’m not so sure if I want to talk to you. I mean, apparently looks aren’t everything. You know, I figured a cute chick would at least be a little bit friendly.

Her: “I have a boyfriend”

You: Figures. [either neg hit the BF for not committing “What? You’re not engaged yet?” or Take the “He sounds really nice” approach]

You: You’re not so anti-social after all. I’m [your name.]

Her: [Gives her name]

You: What are you listening to?

Her: [Song Name by Band Name]

You: I should let you get back to your anti-social-ism-ness [Gets up to leave.]

Her: “I’m not anti-social! I just like to relax on my ride home, and unwind

You: [From there you continue the conversation]

30. If She Spills Her Drink

The following routines are from TYRYONE1991

You:  Enjoying your Drink?

Her: Yes!

You:  Good, so are my shoes! (Cheeky Smile)

31. If She Stumbles

You:  One foot in front of the other dear. (Cheeky Smile)

32. If She Drops Something

You:  I’m cutting you off! (Cheeky Smile)

33. If She Bumps Into You

You:  An Introduction Will Be Sufficient (Cheeky Smile)

32. If She’s Looking Closely At Something To Read It

You:  Forget your glasses? (Cheeky Smile)

33. If She Touches You

You: Settle down love! (Cheeky Smile)

34. If A Girl Is Sitting At Table By Herself

You:  How many chairs do you need (Cheeky Smile)

35. If She Is looking For Something In Her Handbag

You: It’s always in the last place you look. (Cheeky Smile)

36. If She’s A Bartender (Pouring Drink)

You:  Good work. It’s a shame you miss heard my order (Cheeky Smile)

37. If You See A Dancing Girl

You:  Do I have to show you how to dance (Cheeky Smile)

38.  If She’s Holding The Door

The following routines are from AUSTISMUS

You:  You make a very good door holder [smile and continue to chat]

39. When She Is Dressed Particularly Slutty At A Club

You: I hate how women feel they have to dress like whore to feel sexy. In my opinion, the sexiest thing a woman can wear is whatever shows her personality because beauty is common.

[Go immediately into the “Beauty is common” routine]

You: What’s rare in a woman is great energy and a positive outlook on life. It’s what’s inside that really counts right?

40. When Her Bag Or Shirt Or Anything Is animal Print (leopard, tiger, etc.)

You: I see you’re a big game hunter

Her: [whatever she says – talk over it]

You: Now when you catch your prey, do you first tear at it with your teeth or do you have some manner of talons that reveal themselves in a moment of frenzy?

[Continue asking questions that unflatteringly imply she tears at dead meat with her teeth]

41. When She’s Wearing Any Sunglasses That Look Remotely Like Aviators

You: Hey! [big high-energy stop] I like your sunglasses! You look like the Terminator [Arnold voice] ‘Ah’ll bee baaack’

You: Let me hear your Austrian accent…”

[If she complies with an Austrian accent or a giggle -great, play with it a bit then stack to fluff]

or

[If she does not go with it neg her and get out]

You: Yeah I guess you don’t look like a good actor from up close. [Stack to Sasha day game] Well I stopped you because you’re beautiful, but you don’t seem very friendly – are you?

42. If She’s A Blonde Girl

You: Is it true that blonds are dumb? Quick what’s the quad root of 2401?

Her: Ummm. I don’t know…

You: Crap! They were right!

[Start to walk away]

You: No but seriously though. I was actually blond as a child and my hair changed this color. Of course blonde men aren’t dumb. We’re villainous like in Lethal Weapon or World War II.

[Stack quickly]

43. If She’s A Brunette Girl

You:  Is it true blonds have more fun? Quick – what was the last spontaneous and exciting thing you did?

Her: Uh…

You: Crap! It’s true. I’ll see you later. [Pretending to leave] I’m going to go find a blonde.

[Let her pull you back or step back to give her one more chance]

 

 

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